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    Is it ok to give your boyfriend a key if you live with a roommate?

    My roommate keeps talking about wanting to give her boyfirend a key to our apartment but I think that is something she should wait to do when she has her own place. What do you think?

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    my cuz gave a key to her boyfriend and her room mate went out with her boyfriend after they broke up

12 Answers best answer

  • 4

    If my roommate wanted to do that, I would feel uncomfortable. He doesn't live there, he doesn't pay rent. It's just not right for him to access to your place whenever he wants.

  • 3

    I think you're roommate should respect the fact that she doesn't live alone and so she shouldn't give a key to a shared apartment. Your privacy and possessions are just as important as hers and she shouldn't put yours in jeopardy. Dating or not, roommates, boyfriends and keys are always a bad idea.

  • 1

    If your not comfortable with it then I don't think she should give him the key...that's just stupid and disrespectful.  When she does have her own place then she can give who ever the key but for now she needs to respect your privacy too.  Why does he need to come around the apartment if she's not there anyways?

  • 1

    I would say consult the roommate, and if they are uncomfortable, it is a complete and total no. If they agree to it, let the guy have a key, but I think it would be best to put up some boundaries about when he can or can't come in.

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    If you don't think it's right, you're probably not comfortable enough around her boyfriend for it to be okay. There's nothing inherently wrong with it. My boyfriend has a key to my house, but everyone here treats him like family anyway. Sometimes, it's just not appropriate. You'll have to tell her if you're really against it. She probably doesn't see it as a big deal.

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    What if you were taking a shower and he came in?! Definitely inappropriate for her to give him one if you're not okay with it. Tell her her space is also your space, and he can just ring the bell.

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    Yeah, I'd say don;t do it.

    She needs to know she doesn't live alone and what if he comes over and shes not there. It'd just be awkward for everyone!

  • 1

    Doesn't sound like a good idea because of SO many reasons. It's you and your roommate's apartment, not his. He shouldn't get a key.

  • 0

    not unless the roomate is comfortable with it . 

  • 0

    One thing I have to bring up (as it hasn't been mentioned) is ridiculously important, & infrequently thought of...

    If this turns into a serious conversation, & she is actually 100% serious about giving him a key

    CHECK YOUR LEASE/RENTAL AGREEMENT

    A lot of rental agreements these days have stipulations regarding copying/distributing keys, how many people can have access to the apartment via key, etc....& there's even potential for any of this to actually be against your rental agreement.

    Also, if this is something that she keeps pushing, you should flat out tell her that you are not comfortable with him having a key to an apartment you share the supporting weight of. If your gut tells you she should have her own place before making a call like that, LISTEN TO YOUR GUT. Tell her that when she has her own place, she can make those kinds of calls on her own...as long as you share the apartment, it's something you also need to be comfortable with.

  • 0

    Ask your roommate first, duh...

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    It's something you both have to be comfortable with. If either of you isn't then its a complete no, no. Neither of you should be put under pressure by the other.

    If you're comfortable with him turning up when you're just out of the shower or lounging around in your underwear, then OK. If not, the answer is no.

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